We have all seen her. She starts off as a little girl who’s friends leave her on the swings in the park. She gets up to follow them, but realizes she has no reason, or need, or invitation to join them. They are her friends…But they didn’t remember her..so she stays. Sad to not be included, but she plasters that smile on her face because she figures that the rest of the world should think she is having the time of her life.
In high school she spends most days wandering the halls by herself. Reading through lunch, through sporting events, through that day in April when everyone is out dancing at prom. In reality books are easier than people, so…It is what it is.
In her 20’s she spends Saturday night at home. She is a wallflower.
Wow. I think I just described myself!
There is a difference between being a wallflower, someone who is shy and reserved. Someone who would rather be invisible. And someone who has no confidence. However, Being a wallflower generally means that you are lacking at least some part of your confidence. The confidence that people want to know you. That they want to know what you are about. Lacking the confidence that you are worthy of being known.
I’ve always been one to have compassion on the painfully shy. I have a vein of that in myself, so I know that it truly is painful. But It was brought back to life at the park the other day. The little girl who gets left in the dust over and over and over again. She is the odd ball. The square peg in the round hole. And yet her beauty, and her magnificence shine through the wall that she has put up. Because while she may be a wallflower. She also has a wall in front of her..One self constructed. One that she is begging silently for someone to kick in. Someone to rescue her. Someone to hold her hand and teach her how to run. because being a wallflower is painful in the hardest way. Being a wallflower knocks the wind out of you. And yet, you get up and you keep going..
Because someday…someone, somewhere will see you..